Well, I just moved on. What else can you do? We (my partner and I) are back to being affectionate with each other and back to the comfort of everyday routines. I've let the rudeness, and the refusals just slide. Will that work in the long run? I don't know. I no longer know whether being able to forgive, without resolution, and just move on is a good thing, or just a sign of 'can't be bothered'. Is it about caring enough, or about not caring enough? The eternal mystery.
Today the sun is shining. The last throes of summer are here. Daylight savings is over so the mornings seem shinier, but the evenings come down quickly. How soon the season will turn and before long we will be splitting wood, and stoking the fire. It seems a goodly while since winter last was here, and that is a positive thing. I don't like it when the season spins around and I feel like just a moment ago it was here before. I like it that it feels like summer stretched out an the warmth lasted longer than a minute.
What am I doing with myself today? I have a psychologists appointment, and that's pretty much it. I think I'll make a curry later, and do a meal plan for next week. Now that the oven is working again, I should factor in a lasagne. Next weeks a bit of a busy one, so it might need to be on the weekend.
I'm sleepy right now. I woke up when my partner left for work. But last night I sat up and watched a movie. It was an Australian movie called 'The Boys are Back'. It made me cry. It was a poignant story, about a father who lost his partner, and was dealing with his two sons, with vast seas between them, and all the while, coping with his own grief. I loved the story, and the pace, and the settings. It was on a commercial channel, so I got the kitchen mostly clean during the ad breaks. Not quite, but I forgave myself that when 11pm rolled around, and with the movie over, I woke my partner (who had been sleeping since before nine) and dredged him off the couch to come upstairs to bed.
Yesterday I worked a half shift (4 hours) in the store, then went down into the city to an agency I have signed up with, hoping to pick up a bit of extra work - ads, or whatever. Just for a bit of additional cash. I had a photo shoot yesterday. The first time I went I neglected to take the requested several changes of outfit, for the pictures for their website. They did take some shots of me that day anyway, in what I had rocked up to my interview in. Yesterday I took in a few more things, and I think some of the shots have turned out OK.
I have no idea if it's a stupid thing to do or not. I haven't done that kind of work before, really. The photo shoot cost me $250, and other than that, I think they just take a percentage, if they manage to get you any work. I'm hoping I get a bit here and there, but I have not a clue what the odds are, or if they have people who sit on their books for years, and never get anything. We shall see.
And that's just about it for now. I'm sleepy. Maybe I'll catch a bit of extra zzzz before I actually get up for the day. Then when I do get up for the day, well - I guess I'll work out my plans then. Quite frankly, I don't feel like doing much at all!
Today the sun is shining. The last throes of summer are here. Daylight savings is over so the mornings seem shinier, but the evenings come down quickly. How soon the season will turn and before long we will be splitting wood, and stoking the fire. It seems a goodly while since winter last was here, and that is a positive thing. I don't like it when the season spins around and I feel like just a moment ago it was here before. I like it that it feels like summer stretched out an the warmth lasted longer than a minute.
What am I doing with myself today? I have a psychologists appointment, and that's pretty much it. I think I'll make a curry later, and do a meal plan for next week. Now that the oven is working again, I should factor in a lasagne. Next weeks a bit of a busy one, so it might need to be on the weekend.
I'm sleepy right now. I woke up when my partner left for work. But last night I sat up and watched a movie. It was an Australian movie called 'The Boys are Back'. It made me cry. It was a poignant story, about a father who lost his partner, and was dealing with his two sons, with vast seas between them, and all the while, coping with his own grief. I loved the story, and the pace, and the settings. It was on a commercial channel, so I got the kitchen mostly clean during the ad breaks. Not quite, but I forgave myself that when 11pm rolled around, and with the movie over, I woke my partner (who had been sleeping since before nine) and dredged him off the couch to come upstairs to bed.
Yesterday I worked a half shift (4 hours) in the store, then went down into the city to an agency I have signed up with, hoping to pick up a bit of extra work - ads, or whatever. Just for a bit of additional cash. I had a photo shoot yesterday. The first time I went I neglected to take the requested several changes of outfit, for the pictures for their website. They did take some shots of me that day anyway, in what I had rocked up to my interview in. Yesterday I took in a few more things, and I think some of the shots have turned out OK.
I have no idea if it's a stupid thing to do or not. I haven't done that kind of work before, really. The photo shoot cost me $250, and other than that, I think they just take a percentage, if they manage to get you any work. I'm hoping I get a bit here and there, but I have not a clue what the odds are, or if they have people who sit on their books for years, and never get anything. We shall see.
And that's just about it for now. I'm sleepy. Maybe I'll catch a bit of extra zzzz before I actually get up for the day. Then when I do get up for the day, well - I guess I'll work out my plans then. Quite frankly, I don't feel like doing much at all!
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